34 Weeks

I  missed the update last week. So now I am at 33 Weeks and 5 Days.

I am feeling a lot better this week. I am still sick, but not even close to what it was! I can definitely get through the next 6 weeks feeling like this. The uncomfortable parts of pregnancy have definitely hit me these last couple of weeks though. I thought I had to pee a lot before-I was wrong. This is a lot! Sometimes it is literally every 10 minutes! I am having back aches and I feel SO lopsided when I walk. I have definitely got the waddle down. All of this is not as bad as being as sick as I was though, so I feel like pregnancy is a bit of a breeze right now!

Yesterday I had a checkup and Greg was not able to get out of work to go with me. This isn't too big of a deal, the checkups are short and very routine, so I have been to several by myself. With him working two jobs, it is hard for him to get out of both of them for an appointment. I decided to call my mum to see if she wanted to go with me. I knew the appointment wouldn't be very exciting, but she is one of my best friends, and I enjoy the time with her. Also, I knew she would get to hear Kris' heartbeat. It was just a coincidence that it was her birthday! It was a lot of fun, and I teared up thinking about the significance of her getting to hear her first grandchild's heartbeat. It was a really fun experience, and I love sharing it with my mother who has been through all of the highs and lows of pregnancy several times. I think she is just as excited about this baby as Greg and I are, which makes time with her even more fun. I love that when we are just  having a normal conversation she puts her hands on my tummy while we talk :).

Okay, weekly update-
How far along? 34 Weeks
Stretch marks? I do have some. It's funny though, they don't bother me as much as I thought they would.  
Sleep: I am always scared to answer this question. I am still sleeping pretty well. I am hoping that will last the entire next 6 weeks, but I won't count on it. 
Best moment this week: Spending time with my mum yesterday.  
Miss Anything? Running. I haven't been able to run in a few weeks because my belly just makes everything uncomfortable! It used to be my stress reliever, and now, at the most stressful time in my life, I can't run!  
Movement: She is quite the mover still. The doctor can't ever get a good reading of her heartbeat because she kicks the wand.
Food cravings: No cravings, however I have gotten a huge appetite lately! That is new this week for me and I am not a fan.   
Anything making you queasy or sick: Still sick in the evenings and in the mornings. If I let myself get hungry at all I get sick, and if I don't take my meds. But, it is a lot better this week.      
Gender: Girl
Labor Signs: Braxton Hicks Contractions.
Symptoms: Heartburn and peeing a lot.
Belly Button in or out? It goes in and out, depending on where baby is.
Wedding rings on or off? On.
Happy or Moody most of the time: Just ecstatic. This is an amazing time in my life.
Looking forward to: Three day weekend! Work is getting harder and harder as I get closer to my due date. This is a much needed break. 

32 Weeks

31 weeks and 5 days. I am almost finished with my 32nd week! That means not much time left!

I had a routine doctor's appointment this morning. Everything checked out great, and I am measuring exactly on track (take that everyone who says I am huge-my belly is perfect ;P).

We had our baby shower last weekend. I thought it went great. My friend hosted it and did such a good job. I felt so showered with love, advice, and gifts. This baby has enough bows and and outfits to get her through college! She is a very loved girl. It was great getting to see family that I don't get to see often.

This week I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have so much to do to prepare for her arrival. She doesn't have a car seat yet! I know that we still have time, but I feel like these last few weeks have gone by so fast, what if the next few follow suit? There was also a lot of stress at work this week. It was difficult for me to come into work with a smile today. I am hoping the stress will dwindle, but I have a feeling that may take a while. Yesterday was incredibly stressful and baby wasn't moving much. I kept trying to poke at her and drink orange juice to make her move. When I got home I told Greg that I needed to lie down to see if I could get her to move and he put his hand on my belly and said, "Hey baby, I love you!" and she began moving immediately! All day I was worried about her, but she will move for her daddy? I can't believe she is already a daddy's girl!

Weekly update for our little daddy's girl:
How far along? 32 Weeks
Stretch marks? I have a few, but won't complain too much.
Sleep: With the stress this week, my mind can't stop moving long enough for me to sleep.
Best moment this week: The baby shower for sure. Kris is surrounded by people who love her even before she is born!
Miss Anything? Red Bull  
Movement: It has slowed down some this week. I think she is running out of room. Her kicks don't have as much power.
Food cravings: I haven't had any cravings, but fruits and veggies always sound great.   
Anything making you queasy or sick: yep. Everything!  ;)     
Gender: Girl
Labor Signs: Braxton Hicks Contractions.
Symptoms: Heartburn and exhaustion.
Belly Button in or out? Still flat. I can tell when baby is near it because it will poke out a bit.
Wedding rings on or off? On.
Happy or Moody most of the time: So incredibly happy!
Looking forward to: Finishing with organization of the nursery. I need an experienced mother to help me know where to put everything. I am lost!

31 Weeks

30 Weeks and 4 days. That means on Sunday I will officially be 8 months pregnant! Only two months left! That is crazy!

I keep joking with Greg that we have a beautiful nursery for her to come home to, but we can't take her home because we don't even have a car seat yet! That is supposed to be like the first thing you get for your baby :)

Last week I thought my morning sickness was over. I was feeling better, and not throwing up nearly as much, but this week it has been back with a vengeance. Some days it is just as bad as it was first trimester. Though I do really love being pregnant, and feeling her move, I won't be too sad when I am not pregnant any longer. This has been really hard on my body. Throwing up is never fun, but when you are throwing up several times a day along with other pregnancy symptoms, it is enough to make you go crazy.

This week was a roller coaster of ups and downs. Last week my best friend's brother in law passed away. He was only 33 years old and left behind a young son and a very pregnant wife. It has upset me beyond words. I can't imagine being alone in this journey, and she lost her support so suddenly. Caleb was a fun guy. He was always cracking jokes, I think he could make anyone laugh. There are many people who will miss him and though we have to get past the heartache, I don't think we can ever really move on from it. His wife, Amber, will be in my prayers forever, as well as his son and unborn daughter. She will never get to meet her father.

This has made me cherish what I have so much more. It could all be gone in the blink of an eye. Caleb died unexpectedly. In one night, Amber's entire world has changed. I can't imagine the pain she must be feeling. So hug those around you a little tighter today. Remember that we are not promised tomorrow.

I am so thankful to get to share this journey with Greg. So, on to the regular pregnancy update:

How far along? 31 Weeks
Stretch marks? They are there, but I have seen worse ones. I just hope they don't get any worse.
Sleep: If we can get the house cool enough with this heat I actually sleep well so far.
Best moment this week: Going to dinner to celebrate our anniversary on Saturday. I so enjoy getting date nights with Greg.
Miss Anything? Being able to bend over, and then stand straight again ;)   
Movement: She is still quite the mover! She gets shy when some people touch her, but with her daddy and her grandma, she moves even more.   
Food cravings: No real cravings, but I always want raw fruits and veggies.   
Anything making you queasy or sick: being pregnant ;)     
Gender: Girl
Labor Signs: Still some Braxton Hicks, but nothing too serious.
Symptoms: heartburn.
Belly Button in or out? that stubborn thing just won't stick out yet! .
Wedding rings on or off? On.
Happy or Moody most of the time: So happy!
Looking forward to: Baby shower Saturday! My friend has done such a great job planning it! I think we will have a lot of fun. 

Life

We had our lives all planned out:

We got married young and we planned on trying to have kids pretty quickly after we got married. As you know, we had problems with that.

Our dream has always been to be full time missionaries. Greg worked really hard in college to learn Spanish so that we could make that dream a reality. Here we are, still in the states. So far we still have no open doors for our mission work.

Greg found a really awesome job that is very difficult to get. He started the process and we are still waiting on the next steps.

Greg started the process to be an Oklahoma City Police Officer to help as a stepping stone to get us some missionary work. We have been working on that process since basically December only to be turned down today, 8 months later. He has turned down other job opportunities and put everything on hold so that he could have this job, and apparently it was for nothing.

My heart is feeling really heavy right now. Greg is incredibly brilliant! He has a degree from a great college, he is fluent in two languages, and he is so passionate about life. I have never met anyone more hardworking than him. He deeply cares about his family and about people in general.

We want the best for our children. We want to be able to raise them in a loving environment, where they learn a lot and get the most out of life. To do that, we have decided it would be best for me to stay at home. I could be a stay at home mom while Greg works to provide for us. Now, this isn't looking like a possibility.

It is incredibly difficult knowing exactly what we want from life and getting none of it. We have all these huge plans, and we know that some of them are ridiculous, and maybe completely irrational, but it would be nice if something would fall into place for us.

Yes, we have a beautiful baby girl on the way, but now how are we going to give her the best life possible? How can we provide for her both emotionally and physically? It seems we can only do one at a time.

I desperately try to wait patiently for God. I need to be confident that he has a plan for us, but it is becoming so difficult. At what point do you completely stop trying to make things work your way and give it to God? I feel like if we don't put any effort in, than we will have no options. God doesn't exactly work that way-things don't typically just fall in your lap. What are we doing wrong? Greg has been so great about pursuing anything that looked promising, even if it wasn't what he wanted. He is working 2 jobs right now completely unrelated to his degree.

I want to say that I am not complaining. We are 22 years old, we own a house, a nice car, and we can currently support Kris financially. God has blessed us in numerous ways.  This just isn't where we thought we'd be by the time she got here. Rather than questions being answered, we are more confused than ever. Doors just keep shutting in our faces with the supposed open doors hiding somewhere.

I am not asking for pity, or even really advice. Just prayers. Please pray for our patience through this. Pray for open doors and for our hearts to be open to change. Pray that we can give up all plans to walk with the Lord and that we can see a purpose for where we are in life right now, and where we will be in the coming months. I am terrified of what the future holds.

30 Weeks Update

29 Weeks, 4 days pregnant.
Only 73 more days! That doesn't sound like very many days to me at all!

This last week was awesome. We are finished painting the nursery and it looks amazing! I can't wait to show it off. Watch for pictures in about 2 weeks. We want to put everything together before showing it off. Greg and his little sister, Katie, did most of the hard work with the painting. I was able to contribute some. It took about a day and a half to finish entirely with the three of us painting. I keep peeking in the room to look at it. This little girl is already so spoiled :)

As you know, we celebrated our 3 year anniversary yesterday. It doesn't seem like a big anniversary, but for us it was. It was our last anniversary with just the two of us. That is both exciting and terrifying! He got me some really beautiful flowers that were delivered to my work. They made the girls in the teller line jealous, I think that was what he was trying to accomplish ;)

Weekly Questions:
How far along? 30 Weeks
Stretch marks? I don't want to talk about it :(
Sleep: I have been lucky enough so far to be sleeping fairly well.
Best moment this week: Painting the nursery. It looks even better than I had pictured it.
Miss Anything? My toes. Where have they gone?  
Movement: She doesn't kick as hard right now, I think she is running out of room, but she moves a lot.   
Food cravings: None this week.   
Anything making you queasy or sick: everything! ;)    
Gender: Girl
Labor Signs: BH contractions
Symptoms: heartburn.
Belly Button in or out? getting closer and closer to an outie.
Wedding rings on or off? On.
Happy or Moody most of the time: incredibly happy
Looking forward to: Greg and I have our first birthing class tonight! I can't wait to learn about how labor might go.   

3 year anniversary

Three years ago today I married my best friend. I promised to stand with him through all of the highs and lows of life. Luckily for me, most of life with him has been highs. In these three years we have done a lot! We have been to Disney World twice, we drove to Mexico for a mission trip once, we have lived in 4 different homes, we bought a house, bought two cars, we totalled a car in the middle of Arkansas, we drove to Vegas, have been pregnant 3 times, had 2 miscarriages, drove to Texas to see Wicked, and went to Colorado with my family. We have learned a lot about each other, and have grown so much closer together. I can honestly say that I enjoy being with him and everyday seems to just get better. I am so thankful for the husband that he is and the father that he will be. He is still my best friend and I am so excited to spend eternity with him!

A short list of some of my favorite things about him:

He loves God. This is really important to me because together we have worked so hard at having a Godly marriage and will work at being Godly parents. He has taught me so much through his walk.

He is so caring and thoughtful. He always asks me if there is anything he can do for me.

He is just as excited about our baby as I am. He rubs my belly all the time, kisses it, and speaks to it in Spanish. He jumped right on board with my crazy idea to paint a huge tree in our nursery and even did most of the work for it.

His dreams. He has such big dreams for our family and he wants so badly to be doing Godly work. He feels like we are very much called to missions and every job decision he makes is to work in that direction.

He is WAY smart. I love seeing how his brain works. He knows so much about how everything works and if he doesn't already know how it works, he is really good at figuring it out.

He is the best husband ever. I never imagined marriage could be so fun. I love having sleepovers with him every night. With a baby on the way, I know that the next three years will have even more adventures! Our life is changing in the best way possible.